Wellington, Cape Town



What can you control in your life? Or do you believe that you are in control of everything?

So many times I have tried to control things in my life, and for the most part, I failed.  There is VERY little I can control yet I still try.  Talk about the definition of insanity…

Just last week, I experienced God’s hand in 2 issues I was facing.  I had been praying about them for a while and last week was crunch time.  So, on Monday morning I felt like I had to do something, had to control the outcome, only to mess it up, have it cost me more, and have God sort it out on Wednesday. 

The second issue I also tried to fix.  I did get the help I needed but it wasn’t right.  On Friday at 6 am I was standing in my kitchen, talking to God.  I remember saying to Him (so embarrassed by this) “If I hadn’t done what I did, I wouldn’t have managed now.  You didn’t come through for me.”   30 minutes later He did come through for me.  I was so ashamed, and couldn’t apologise enough to God.

Again, I was shown that certain things are out of my control BUT not for God.  He is capable of so much more than we could ever fathom. Again, I was limiting God, my living God who loves me more than I will ever know or understand.  Will we ever understand His power?

Why do we limit God?  Why do we try to fix things on our own?  Do we really think we have the capacity to control certain outcomes or to fix situations?

What can I control:

  • My attitude/thoughts
  • My effort
  • My actions

We do need to try our best, but we must rely on God. All.  The. Time. 

Our humanness can be a mess.  It comes into play daily.  We give into our desires – usually negative – and we sin, then we beat ourselves up for sinning and convince ourselves that God could never love us.  Remember – God loves sinners, but we need to repent and try harder.  When temptation hits and we know we shouldn’t do something, we need to lean on Him, we need to pray and ask Him for the strength required.

It gets easier, with hard work and persistence.  It will not happen overnight. But it is worth the effort.  The reward is greater than we can ever imagine.

I believe in letting go and letting God.  This doesn’t mean I don’t try.  This doesn’t mean that I don’t put in the effort.  This means I try to let go of controlling a situation or outcome.  And even though I believe in this, it is NOT easy! 

I am a work in progress.  I have seen how God has worked in me, how He has changed me.  But I have been open to it.  I want Him to change me, and I still ask Him to change me to be the person He needs me to be.  There have been times where I feel like I don’t want Him to change me anymore because it has been difficult, and challenging, but deep down I want Him to.  I want to do His work here on earth, and only He can prepare me for that.

So I will keep trying, and I will still fail but I will keep trying because I know that I have God on my side.  That He cares for every aspect of my life – big and small.  He knows me better than I know myself.

Remember that just like that broken crayon, God is always able to use our brokenness to create something beautiful. Little do we know that God is using our brokenness to create something more beautiful than we could ever imagine.

How do you let go of control?

Keeping it simply raw & real.

Your sister in Christ.

Philippians 4:6

Do not be anxious about anything, but in every situation, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God.


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